As a multipotentialite you’ll always have a myriad of projects on at one time - it’s just the way it is. Maybe it’s a main job to pay the bills, a side hustle to develop your skills and a simple love of karate for the sheer thrills. When each of the interests are chugging along nicely, making marginal gains each day, everything feels wonderful. Progress is happening. And you’re in the driving seat. What could possibly go wrong?
Until it does. Perhaps it starts suddenly as you’re made redundant from the job that was bringing in the bag. Or slowly as the clients dry up in the side hustle with one project after another just not landing. You’re told “Now’s not the right time” again and again until it becomes too bitter a pill to swallow. The usual optimism that you brought to your everyday is replaced with a feeling of stagnation that you can’t quite shake. The hope departs. In it’s place an anxiety stirs, fixing you with a fear of the unknown.
It’s in these choppy moments that a downward spiral can too often take hold. The negativity becomes an infection that spreads from one interest to another, compounding the challenge several times over. What started as a small, seemingly insignificant issue has now become a catastrophe. It feels like everything you’ve worked so hard to build is falling apart. Slipping through your fingers before you’ve even had a chance to collect your thoughts.
These are THE defining moments.
Ones in which you either rise to the challenge ahead of you, accept the new reality and adapt to it’s circumstances or run away from it’s inevitability, comforting yourself in short-term pleasures to distract you from the pain.
Choosing the former won’t be easy. Especially when your situation involves a lack of income, friends or support to see you through. But, commit to it with an optimistic pragmatism and you’ll emerge the other side a new person with lessons only that one experience could have taught you.
But, how do you manage these moments?
As someone who has faced months of not knowing where the next project is coming from, has redefined themselves after closing 2 businesses and still hasn’t worked a full-time job (maybe that’ll change one day), here’s everything I’ve learnt about living with life’s many unknowns…
The Beliefs Beneath
Rather than shying away from those defining moments, I consciously try to create them for myself. Whether it’s by committing to increasing my costs of living when I don’t yet have the revenue to afford it or rejecting a contract with a client without any alternatives, I know that these experiences force me to outgrow the person I once was. Each time I’ve found innovative solutions to the problem ahead of me, relishing in the challenge of the moment.
However, balancing this healthy amount of anxiety has a set of beliefs beneath it that you’ll need to understand before embracing the unknown.
Here’s how I avoid overwhelm…
1) “I Trust Myself to Figure it Out”
I believe I can overcome any challenge.
I know I am capable of anything I set my mind to. No matter how big or small, with enough time and energy it can be achieved. Maybe it’s a lifetime of proving to myself time and again that I’ll find a way through anything. Or it’s a complete overestimation of my own abilities. Either way, this mindset opens up a plethora of opportunities unencumbered by self-doubt. It means that when I’m faced with a problem like a lack of revenue next month or a stagnation in learning, no option for resolving it is off the table. All that’s left to do is simply find the best solution for me right now and commit to it.
2) “I Understand the Harsh Truths”
I’m not delusional of reality.
I know my numbers. The forecasts are frequented. The pipeline is prepared. The discovery calls are detailed. There are hard dates for when the cash runs out. And all the options are spider diagrammed. Even those that require taking one step back before taking two steps forward. They might not be written down, but there’s a Plan A through Z circling in my head, each assigned a deadline for action. While I stare at this reality ahead of me I must look at the numbers blankly, using them as motivation, not endless anxiety. Otherwise I know the overwhelm will inevitably creep me towards inaction.
3) “I Must Look After Myself First”
I need to feel good to perform my best.
I know I am not the same person without my happiness habits. Whether it’s 7 hours sleep, 10 minutes meditating or daily exercise, every single one of them is vital to maintain if I’m going to withstand the challenge ahead. Protecting what makes me an effective human being is what will always maintain the mindset of optimism that I need. Socialising is important too. Lest the isolation turn me insane. However, if a sprint in effort is needed to resolve the problem it’s the evenings and weekends with friends that will be put to one side way before I even consider my other habits.
4) “I Know What Moves the Needle”
I understand which are the most important tasks.
I know what the grunt work looks like. Whether it’s cold outreaching prospects, crafting up daily LinkedIn posts or attending networking events, I trust that these actions will make the difference. Once I’m sure where to spend my efforts, it simply becomes a numbers game in which I’m determined to create my own luck. Sometimes there’s an unexpected pay-off from playing the long game of building a personal brand, investing into relationships or creating a community. Other times it’s about asking the network I have for support and being surprised by their willingness to help.
5) “I Accept a Lack of Control over the Future”
I refrain from trying to control everything.
I know that life is like a dice. Sometimes it will throw me 1s or 2s that I need to accept and move on from. Other times it’ll shows me a 5 or 6 when I least expect it. I’ll try to rig the game for as many high numbers as I can. But, often more important is continuing to play the game, rolling the dice just one more time. And believing along the way that I’m a lucky person who will be rewarded for their efforts - either in lessons learnt or money earnt. My focus is on controlling the controllables and letting go of what is outside of influence, directing my energy not at outrage at the unfairness of the world, but doing more of the small actions that I can to change the life I have.
Embedding the Action
Everyone’s risk appetite & situation is different.
You don’t have to go all-in self-employed to embrace your many identities as a multipotentialite. You can explore each interest one at a time as hobbies and side hustles alongside a full-time job. That’s more than okay.
But, if you are serious about throwing yourself into the deep end know that you’re not alone. Find (or build) a community with others who are facing the same pressures and anxieties as you are. That way you’ll always have someone to turn to on both your best and your worst days. Having another person to share those moments of anxiety and excitement you’ll inevitably face along the journey is an absolute game changer.
And if you’re unsure what moves the needle for you, start with networking. Have intentional conversations with decision makers who can open you up to opportunities you didn’t know existed. And avoid focusing solely on your age group, looking for the wealth of experience other generations can bring.
For the fear of the unknown is also an excitement of it’s infinite possibilities. All you’ve got to do is trust yourself to figure it out, take action before it’s too late and look after yourself along the way.
You’ve got this. Things will work out.
Quotes from the Community
Question: How do you manage your own emotions when faced with uncertainty?
“Sometimes I think about what the alternative is - having a life where I know exactly what’s going to happen for the rest of my life. When I visualise myself in that lifestyle, it turns me off completely. For me, boredom is the absolute killer of life. It’s much better being exhilarated by the adventure of carving your own path in life. It’s uncertain, but that’s part of the fun.”
“There will always be waves of these emotions triggered by different events. Some days you can surf them, some days you can’t find your balance and you’re pulled under. My aim is to minimise the bounce-back time between the wave striking me, my recovery from it, and then swimming back out into the sea. If I’m aligned, swimming out again feels driven by love, purpose and trust in myself to figure it out (or to bounce back even if I don’t figure it out). If I’m not, it feels tense & uncomfortable, driven by insecurity and fear.”
“I believe that "The strongest desire always wins." Every micro decision either advances or pulls you away from what you want. Despite fear, probability or any evidence to the contrary. I feel the only thing you can do in times of uncertainty is move towards the version of reality you want. The rest will take care of itself.”